From within

This life will lead you in circles and swallow you in undertones if you allow it too. It always amazes me how one minute you're up and the next minute you're worse for wear. I'm assuming I'm not the only one that feels this way?

I believe that the majority of my issues stem from a mind that never slows down; one that rarely if ever gives me a break to sit in silence. Sure I'm a dreamer but I'm a worrier too, or should I say more so. Small things hang in my mind like cobwebs that you can't see, nor can find them. The big issues seem to bother me less. I still worry more than the usual person but the small things send me into overdrive. I also thrive on self doubt and indecision! I wish I could grow out of this but I think it will take a valiant effort on my part and help from my wife.

She has already done so much for me that I can't ever thank her enough. Even though myself confidence/esteem remains lower then normal she has allowed it to blossom from the nothingness it once was into what it shall become! Amazing really. It taxes me that she worries more about me then herself. I'm not used to a non family members caring for me. It's the unconditional love that most will only read about in fairy tales. In this I know I'm blessed.

I'm trying to remember that writing clears my mind and soul. It's hard to remember that in life sometimes. Jobs, plans, problems all get in the way of what is and what should be. That my friends is why this blog was created. Feel free to comment...good bad and ugly...I need it, I want it, I thrive off of it. Baby steps to self worth...baby steps to rebuffing self doubt.

One day maybe I can write for a living and put this thesis to the test. Will writing hold up or will...self doubt rearing the head that must be loped off. One day soon I will write and I will seek adventures with my wonderful wife!

Humans are the proverbial work in progress...are we not?